god god god! bless mi!!!

for all of a sudden, i seem to haf been brought back to wen i was in pri 6, sec 4, whilst waiting for PSLE n N-lvls.. e anxiety, e worries, darn!

wenever i recif results, i often get shocks. real big shocks.

imagine my prelims for psle was like 245, wad did i get? 175. darn tat flu? nope. i did nort put in enuff hardwork. yupz. can't blame it on tat freakin flu n tat fever. wadever, i made my way thru.

sec 3? e yr i retained? heavens! i gort 9th in position e 1st half of e yr. in e end? i retained? so? wad can i sae? nth at all. juz, accept fate. *pui*

finally, hardwork paid off? n-lvls. top 10 in e whole cohord. happy? nope. nort enuff. simply becuz i gort both my eng n chi to help. gort A1 for both subjects, which "happily, steadily" placed mi on e 10th position. okie, fine. nort askin for more. bud, imagine sumone who gort C5 for science, actually makin it into top 10 huhz? miracle took place? it certainly did.

esp for sumone who often skips lessons, slps during lessons, prefers spending "precious" learning times to argue wif teachers regardless of wadever than study getting top 10? whatsmore, e top 10 in e whole cohord. i can't believe it. no one could. god muz haf played a joke on mi. could still rember e shock my form teacher gort too.

so, while away my time huhz? i don't noe. plus, e papers tis yr's freakinly easi. u can't believe it. i believe a straight A's sec 4 n/a student can do well too. bud yet, i simply did nort put in enuff effort to enable myself to be "stress-free" for now. non-stop worrying. y? moderations. if oni i put in more hardwork, perhaps, i needn't worry e least bout moderations pulling my grades down. i would be more den grateful if moderations pulled my grades up.

right nw, can't wish for aniting more. oni hope i could actually get A1 for english, and pass both my maths n sciences. hopefully humanes would nort let mi down. wadever. tat's all i ever wish for now. hopefully, all would cum true, and i promise, everyone else would be able to see e effort i am goin to put into my next 3yrs in poly. regardless of which choice of my few well-loved courses i may take.

to live to learn to succeed. tat's wad i believe. tata`

god, bless mi. =)
______________________________________contradicted yet agn at 10:31 pm ;